孙悟空vs猪八戒 - 搞笑小品剧本,幽默校园小品剧本精选(二)

发布时间:2016-04-19 00:39:00 来源:大铁棍娱乐网

《孙悟空vs猪八戒 - 搞笑小品剧本,幽默校园小品剧本精选(二)》是由大铁棍娱乐网(www.datiegun.com)编辑为你整理收集在【相声小品】栏目,于2016-04-19 00:39:00整理发布,希望对你有所帮助,可及时向我们反馈。


Darling. Why did you go up there?
小女子:还不是你这呆子害的。
That's your fault.
八戒:对不起,娘子。对不起,娘子。
Sorry, darling. I’m very sorry.
小女子:看你这么辛苦,我也摔疼了,那就休息休息吧。
You look so tired, and I feel sore. Let’s have a rest.
八戒:太好了。 我们就休息一下吧!
Have a rest? That’s a good idea. Let’s have a rest.
八戒听了高兴地坐在下面休息,小女子仔细地打量他。
小女子(撒娇地):夫君,你是哪里的神仙,我都还不知道,怎么能嫁给你呢?你可要告诉我。
Honey, how can I marry you? I don’t even know where you come from. You must tell me
the truth first.
八戒:唉,别提了,想当年我本是天上的天篷元帅,上天入地,八面威风。只因冒犯了嫦娥,
被玉帝贬下凡尘,错投了猪胎,长成这般模样。
Alas! Don’t mention it. I was Tianpeng marshal, I could fly between heaven and the
world. Only because I made a big mistake, I was punished by Yudi. So I became a pig.
That’s why I am so ugly.
小女子:亏你长得这么丑,还敢出来见人。
You look too ugly to meet people.
八戒:本来我也不想出来,只是南海观音点化我,叫我在这里等候前往西天的取经人。等了这么久,
也不见,便出来逛逛,能碰到娘子你,是我一生的造化,还管它什么西天取经呢?(八戒高兴地过
去想拉小女子的手)
I didn’t want to come here. Nanhai Guanyin asked me to wait for Tangseng. I've been
waiting for a long time, but nobody has come. It’s lucky to meet you here.
小女子(把手甩开):你说自己是天上的神仙,怎么连我都背不动,真让人难以相信。
You said that you were an immortal in the heaven . Why can’t you carry me? It’s
impossible!
八戒:我真的是天上的神仙,你干嘛不信呢你。
I am really the immortal. Why don’t you believe me?
小女子:那你拿出点本事来瞧瞧。
Show me some gongfu then.
八戒:好,让我露两手来给你看看。
OK, let me show you my gongfu.
从石头后拿出钉钯,舞了起来。小女子暗暗点头。当八戒的钉色舞到小女子面前时,被小女子一把
抓住,往石山后面一拖,八戒被拖了过去。
八戒:娘子,你怎么这么大的力气?
Darling. Why are you so strong?
小女子:有本事你把我拖出去呀。
Pull me out if you can .
八戒做出用力拖的样子,没有发现拖出来的却是悟空。悟空一松手,八戒摔倒在地。
八戒:娘子,你怎么这么狠心把我摔倒了? 不要开玩笑了。
How could you let me fall down? Don’t kid any longer.
悟空大笑:呆子,看看我是谁!
You Silly! Look at me. Who am I?
八戒一看,吓得跳起来:齐天大圣,我的妈呀。
My god! You are Mahatma!
八戒转身想跑,被悟空拦住,两人打了起来,八戒不是对手,被悟空压住,不能动弹。
悟空:呆子,你可还敢在这里害人不成?
You silly! Dare you harm others any more?
八戒:不敢了,不敢了。
No, I dare not!
悟空: 你可还敢在这里娶媳妇?
Dare you wive yet?
八戒:不敢了。大圣爷爷饶我。
No,no. Please forgive me, Mahatma.
悟空:量你也不敢。
I bet you dare not.
悟空放开,八戒转身想跑,被悟空一把抓住耳朵,疼得直叫。
悟空:呆子,想往哪里去?
You silly, where are you going?
八戒:我已答应你,不再闹事了,干嘛还不放我走?
I'll never make trouble any more. Why don't you let me go?
悟空:呆子,我带你去见取经人。
You silly, I'm taking you to meet the sutra-seeker.
八戒:什么?取经人来了?
What? Has Tangseng come?
悟空:走吧。
Yes. Let's go!
两人在台上走半圈,来到房前。
悟空:师傅,出来吧,这妖怪已经被我降服了。
Master, please come out! The spirit has been defeated !
唐僧等人走了出来,老头一家还有些战战兢兢。
悟空:呆子,还不跪下,见过师傅。
You silly, kneel down to meet your master.
八戒忙对着唐僧下跪,口喊师傅。唐僧非常吃惊。
Master, nice to meet you here.
唐僧:徒儿,这是怎么回事?
My prentice, what's up?
悟空:师傅,这是观世音菩萨特意让他在此等候陪您上西天取经的。
Master, he will accompany you to the west at Guanyin's behest.
唐僧:哦,多谢观世音菩萨,既然这样我就收你为徒,赐你法名为
八戒。
I see! Thank Guanyin! Since then, I will take you as my prentice
and name you Bajie.
八戒:谢谢师傅(站了起来)。
Thank you, my master!
老头:恭喜高僧又收神徒。
Congratulations!
唐僧:徒儿们,我们上路吧。(八戒还依依不舍地看着小女子)
Let's go ahead, my prentices.
悟空:八戒,还看什么呢?走了。
Bajie, there is nothing to attach to. Let's go!
八戒恋恋不舍地走到前面带路。
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