《孙悟空vs猪八戒 - 搞笑小品剧本,幽默校园小品剧本精选》是由大铁棍娱乐网（www.datiegun.com）编辑为你整理收集在【相声小品】栏目，于2016-04-19 00:39:00整理发布，希望对你有所帮助，可及时向我们反馈。
孙悟空vs猪八戒
作者:佚名
剧本正文
An English play---- Pig Guy has been defeated by Monkey King
悟空：师傅，是不是太累了?休息一下再走吧。
Master, are you tired? Let’s have a rest.
唐僧：没关系，前面不远就有人家了，到了那里再休息吧。
I am fine. Let’s have a rest later. Look! There is a house over there.
悟空仔细地搀扶唐僧继续行走，同时另一边老头、老妈、小媳妇出场。
小媳妇(做哭状)：爹、妈，我……
Daddy, mommy, I, I …
老头：女儿，快走吧，不然那猪精来了，就走不了了。
Honey, hurry up. The spirit is coming soon.
小媳妇走几步又回头跑回老妈的怀里，抱头痛哭。老头在一边叹息，擦泪。
唐僧、悟空走到他们面前。
悟空：师傅，到了。
Master, here we are.
唐僧(走到老头面前行礼，悟空看见了正在哭的母女俩，觉得奇怪，上下打量)：老施主，我是从
东土大唐前往西天取经的和尚，想借贵地休息一晚，不知方便否?
Excuse me, sir. I am the monk from the east. Can we stay over here tonight?
老头(做哽咽状)：哦，是东土大唐来的高僧啊，可以可以。(别过脸去继续哭泣)
Oh, you are the monk from the east. Sure. Sure, come in, please ……
唐僧正在奇怪，老妈闻声抬起头，仔细打量唐僧，突然扑到唐僧面前。
老妈：高僧啊，你可要救救我的女儿，救救我们一家啊。
Master, please save my daughter, save my family…
唐僧：老施主休要伤心，有什么事慢慢说。
Don’t be sad, madam. Take it easy. What happened?
老头：高僧有所不知，我们这里有一只猪精，今天要来跟我女儿成亲，大家都斗不过它，现在正
准备把女儿送出去逃避
Master, there is a spirit here. He wants to marry my daughter, tonight. We are all
afraid of him.
唐僧：施主莫怕，我这徒弟本领高强，也许他能帮上你们。
Calm down, sir. My apprentice has great capability. Maybe, he can help you.
老头：唉，高僧啊，以前也来过自称本领高强的师傅，结果都被这猪精打跑了。今天你们就躲着
别出来了吧。
Alas! , master, there have been many people who boast to be very capable. But every
time, they were defeated by the spirit. You’d better keep away tonight.
悟空：噢，有这么厉害的妖怪?我倒要会他一会。待会你们只管躲起来，外面发生什么事，都不
用管。
What? Is the spirit really so strong? I’d like to see how great he is. All of you
just stay inside. Don’t come out no matter what happens.
这时起了风声(音乐)，老头一家吓得站起来混身发抖。小媳妇吓得直往老妈怀里钻。悟空镇定
地举手示意，让师傅及老头一家人躲到房间里面去。自己也手搭凉篷看了看，便不慌不忙地也躲
在了门后，露出一段红袖子。
猪八戒大笑着耀武扬威地走上场来，嘴里大喊：小娘子，我来了。
Darling, here I am.
站在台上停一下，见没有动静，觉得奇怪，往房屋里看去，见露出一段红袖子，高兴地一拍手掌。
八戒：小娘子还害羞呢，不敢出来见老猪吗?来，来，来，我们就要是夫妻了，还害什么羞呀!。
Darling, don’t be so shy! Please come to me. Come on, we will be a couple.
猪八戒跑上去轻轻拉住红袖子，把小娘子拖了出来，小娘子作出害羞的样子，有时又做出猴子的
模样。
